CHARTS: “Doom The Dark Ages” Launches at No. 2 on Steam

Okay, so I need to talk about games. But not just, you know, in that typical “here are the stats” way. Let’s make it weird, because why not? Here goes.

Last week, something bizarre happened on Steam. Doom’s back – well, The Dark Ages version, which kinda feels like a wild ride through pixelated madness. Somehow, it snagged the second spot on the sales chart. Can you believe it? Only Counter-Strike 2, that old reliable behemoth, stood in its way. But Doom didn’t seem to mind playing second fiddle. Strange, right?

Meanwhile, out of nowhere, PUBG: Battlegrounds just decided to leap 14 spots. I mean, talk about a comeback. Shanghai’s got something to do with it, what with the PUBG Global Series 8 festivities or something. You could almost hear the graphics cards sputter.

Then, there’s the Steam Deck. Stubbornly sticking to fourth, it’s like that friend who just won’t leave a party. Still hanging out there, waiting for the latest buzz to save it. And oh, Stellar Blade – pre-orders are all abuzz, but the game’s not even out for years. Patience? Not in the gamer dictionary.

Now, Clair Obscur: Expedition 33, what happened there? Slid down to sixth. But, get this, another RPG just zipped up 58 places. Must be the 60% discount. I mean, who says no to a bargain? I once bought a mug I didn’t need because it was half-off. Our wallets can’t resist.

Oh, and Helldivers 2 – just skydiving through the ranks. Probably released some flashy new content, got everybody’s attention. I tried keeping up, but then got sidetracked. And boom, pre-orders for Level 5’s new fantasy adventure are already out there. Time thieves and all.

Rounding this chaotic list off is The Precinct. Some cop drama I haven’t wrapped my head around. Debuted in tenth like it’s sneaking in through the back door.

Well, here it is – the top ten in all their glory:
1. Counter-Strike 2
2. Doom: The Dark Ages
3. PUBG: Battlegrounds
4. Steam Deck
5. Stellar Blade
6. Clair Obscur: Expedition 33
7. Cyberpunk 2077 (Oh yeah, how did I miss this? Still kicking around.)
8. Helldivers 2
9. Fantasy Life I: The Girl Who Steals Time
10. The Precinct

And there you have it. Should’ve made popcorn for this oddball list. All feeling restless yet?